Suffering through the eyes of cultural change

THE ONLY THING CONSTANT IS CHANGE
WE GO THROUGH CHANGES IN OUR LIFE
SOME CHANGES ARE SHORT SOME ARE LONG
WE STRUGGLE TO DEAL WITH BOTH
IT'S EASIER TO DEAL WITH SHORTER CHANGE THAN WITH LONGER CHANGE
THE GOOD THING NEVER LAST AND FORTUNATELY, THE BAD THING EITHER
WE ARE HAPPY GOING ON VACATION AND DREADING THE END OF VACATION
WHAT GOES UP MUST COMES DOWN
THIS IS SHORT TERM CHANGE

WHAT IS MORE DIFFICULT AND CAUSE MORE SUFFERING IS THE LONGER CHANGE SUCH AS LIFE DEVELOPMENT. WE GO THROUGH LONG PROCESS OF CHANGE IN DEVELOPMENT THAT TAKES YEARS THAT WE DON'T SEE THE CHANGE. AS CHILDREN, WE LIVE OFF OF OUR FAMILY BELIEF SYSTEM, EVENTUALLY WE INDIVIDUALIZE TO THE POINT OF RESISTANCE, THE CLASH BETWEEN OUR INDIVIDUAL AND OUR FAMILY SYSTEM BEFORE WE EVENTUALLY CAN ACCEPT BOTH OUR INDIVIDUAL AND FAMILY SYSTEM.

IN RELATIONSHIP, WE BEGIN BY ADOPTING THE IDEAL RELATIONSHIP OR ADOPTING THE PARTNER'S BELIEF SYSTEM. EVENTUALLY WE START TO ASSERT OUR INDIVIDUAL BELIEF SYSTEM WHERE TWO INDIVIDUAL SYSTEMS ARE TRYING TO MERGE AND WE REBEL AND RESIST OUR RELATIONSHIP BELIEF SYSTEM BEFORE WE CAN ACCEPT THE RELATIONSHIP AND OUR INDIVIDUAL BELIEF SYSTEM.

THIS CAN BE EXPLAINED BY CULTURAL IDENTITY DEVELOPMENT BECAUSE WE ARE ENTERING INTO NEW CULTURE WHEN WE ENTER TO RELATIONSHIP WITH OTHERS.

 ANOTHER WAY TO EXPLAIN SUFFERING IS THROUGH THE PROCESS OF CHANGE ITSELF. PRECONTEMPLATION, CONTEMPLATION, PLANNING, TIME FOR CHANGE, AND MAINTENANCE. MANY PEOPLE CONFUSE THE TIME FOR CHANGE AND MAINTENANCE. THE TIME FOR CHANGE IS WHEN WE PICK A DATE TO START THE CHANGE. MAINTENANCE IS WHAT WE DO AFTER THE CHANGE. WHAT IS DIFFICULT IS THE MAINTENANCE. THIS IS WHY IT IS DIFFICULT ABOUT NEW YEAR RESOLUTION, TO QUIT SMOKING, ETC. THIS ALSO CAN BE APPLIED TO RELIGIOUS CONVERSION. THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BEING BAPTIZED AND TO LIVE A CHRISTIAN LIFE. LIKE THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A WEDDING DAY AND MARRIAGE. BEING BAPTIZED DOESN'T MAKE YOU A CHRISTIAN, YOUR BEHAVIOR MAKES YOU ONE.